Gratitude List

I have been cleaning out my closet and our dressers, not an easy job in any situation, but this time it makes my heart hurt.  I am doing what I need to do to make my room mine.  Brian was the kind of guy that really didn't care WHAT his room looked like, so for the most part it is decorated the way I want it anyway, I'm just working on cleaning it and making it truly my haven.  As I was cleaning I found a journal that Brian used to write in.  In the journal was this Gratitude List and I feel like it is the right thing to do to share it:

I (Brian) am grateful for:
My wife for pulling me out of the dark when I start to give up.
My kids for making me want to live more, love more.
My in-laws for never being negative, always positive and caring and seeing the frustration in our lives.
My mom for making our life easier.
Friends for caring and doing what's needed.
Strangers for helping and changing me, our family.

I (Sheryl) am grateful for:
Having had the love and life that I did with Brian.
My kids for making me smile and see that life goes on after loss.
My parents and siblings (their spouses too!) for loving me the way they do and taking such good care of me.
My mother in law for loving my kids the way she does and giving me an occasional break from parenthood.
My friends who have been amazing throughout the many ups and downs of my moods.
Strangers for saying something nice or bringing us a meal "just because".

Overall, I am grateful that I finally FEEL like cleaning my room and making it mine.  As I continue to clean my room, closet, and dressers I know I will find many treasures.  Some will remind me of a funny moment and others that will make me cry because of my loss.

Whether you are family, friend or stranger, thank you for being a part of my life.  Thank you for walking with me down this winding path of widowhood.